Life Unexpected

It's interesting to think that whenever we are thrust into a situation that is out of our control, is beyond our comfort level, or a circumstance shows up completely unexpected...we deal with it.  We don't seek to bail or sidestep it, we just deal with it.  Our kids get sick and wind up with bodily fluids coming out up and down.  We don't disown them....we deal with it.  Our hours get cut at work.  We tighten our belts and learn to live a bit more frugally.  A health emergency sends a loved one into the hospital, creditors are asking for their money, a national crisis strikes a devastating blow.  We don't leave, we don't quit, we don't give up.  We deal with life when it takes an unexpected turn for the worse.

But, when it comes to our marriages the moment that things get rough or a little bit more than we can bear we are quick to throw in the towel.  This person that we have committed our life to we choose to discard like yesterday's trash than deal with the unexpectedness of it all.  We would rather tear our life apart and leave it in shambles than to deal with multiple pieces it seems to be in.

By not dealing with the issues that arise from within the inner workings of our marriage we are saying that we would rather continue to deal with the pain of a shattered life than to scrape the piece together and fix it.  It would be the same if you were to break a glass in your home (a window, mirror, or drinking glass) and instead of picking up the shards and cleaning up the mess you would rather continue walking, barefoot, on the broken pieces.  Continually being cut and wounded not by the act that broke the glass but by the stubbornness of refusing to clean up and repair the damage.

You would never dream of allowing broken glass to remain underfoot within your home.  Whenever glass breaks in your home, everything else stops until every piece is recovered, picked up, and disposed of.  This is not to say that your marriage is to be disposed of.  No matter what you are doing when the glass breaks, nothing else is as important as that broken glass when it happens.  Conversations are put on hold.  Pressing errands are pushed back.  Nothing else is as important as getting every piece of dangerous glass removed.  You would not want you or someone you loved to be cut by the pieces of glass left lying around.

Imagine that your marriage is a fine piece of china, something you hold dear, that has been passed down from generation to generation.  It holds memories and stories, both good and bad.  It holds history. Now imagine a series of events (your toddler playing with it, an earthquake, clumsy neighbor) that unfolds which breaks your prized possession.  Do you just sweep up the pieces and discard them?  Or do you gather the pieces and attempt to glue them back together.  It's worth a try, right?  

Maybe your marriage is like that fine china that has been broken. Maybe you allowed someone/something too close that didn't cherish it as you do. Something terrible has happened and you are left with the pieces of a failed marriage.  At this moment, NOTHING else is as important as picking up every piece and recovering all that is being lost.  Other friendships can wait.  The job or career that was so important is now trivial, at best.  What was so important yesterday is suddenly and forcibly shoved to the back burner because something of eternal significance is being torn asunder.

But, unlike a broken glass,  a broken marriage is not beyond repair.  Yes, it may be in pieces but that is OK.  You see, there is Someone who is able to take all the varied, broken, misshapen, and dangerous pieces of a marriage and rebuild it.  His Name is Father God.  If you remember He took all the miscellaneous pieces and elements of the world that we see and ordered them and structured them to take shape....all by His spoken Word.  (Genesis 1)

And right now, if you will let Him, He is desiring to speak over the pieces of your marriage.  He wants to order them and structure them so that they will bring Him glory.  And, when He is done, He will step back and call it "Good".

Will you let Him speak?

Josh and Serena