Basics

When I was trying to find a good graphic for the blog it was hard finding something that would "work."  As I needed to find something to write about today I realized how perfect that picture is.....to stand for your marriage is often a very lonely road--but it is also a joyful thing to know we are in God's perfect will.  That picture shows a lot of peace to me...a rainbow....believing in the promises of God that stand true through the test of time.  The rainbow is hope that God keeps His promises.  We can stand firm........

1 Corinthians 16:13-14

 Be on your guard; stand firm in the faith; be courageous; be strong.  Do everything in love.

Do you know the enemy you are fighting? The key in fighting any battle begins with understanding your enemy. To be on your guard you have to know the enemy. "For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms." Ephesians 6:12 Satan is your enemy. Your spouse has been taken captive by Satan to do his evil will. Satan is defeated by the blood of Jesus Christ. This does NOT mean that I believe your spouse had no choice; they had a choice, and they are allowing Satan access into their lives--most often seen evident in the lies and things they speak. Your defense against Satan is praying the Word of God over your marriage.

Having faith...."Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see. And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him." Hebrews 11:1,6

Faith is based on two beliefs; first that God is who He says He is, and second that God will do what He says He will do. When you believe that God will fulfill His promises, even when you do not see a physical manifestation of these promises, you are operating in faith. "

"Jesus replied, 'I tell you the truth, if you have faith and do not doubt, not only can you do what was done to the fig tree, but also you can say to this mountain, "Go, throw yourself into the sea," and it will be done. If you believe, you will receive whatever you ask for in prayer.'" Matthew 21:21-22

Prayer is the physical demonstration of our faith that God exists, that He hears our prayers and that He will deliver on His promises. Faith means resting in what Christ has done for us in the past, but also means trusting Him for what He will do for us in the future.

COURAGE---it takes courage to stand for a broken marriage. The world bombards us with quick solutions and admonitions to "get on with your life." It takes real guts to be obedient to God by standing for your marriage vows. God is on your side. He will never leave you. Be strengthened in your faith, knowing that Jesus is with you every step of the way through the trial of separation or divorce.
"Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the LORD your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you." Deuteronomy 31:6

I pray that you may find encouragement in knowing that you have back-up; God is waging war against Satan and his minions for the salvation of your home and family.

Staying strong.....an important part of standing for the healing of your marriage is realizing that you are powerless to change your spouse. Only God can change a hardened heart. Your strength is not in your own efforts but through humbly submitting your life and family to God's loving care.

"It is God who arms me with strength and makes my way perfect." 2 Samuel 22:33

" For when I am weak, then I am strong." 2 Corinthians 12:10

"I can do everything through him who gives me strength." Philippians 4:13

Everything in love.....hands down, the hardest part of standing for the healing of your marriage is giving up the right to be angry and bitter towards the spouse that has left you or even the spouse who is with you but making your life miserable. God commands us to do everything in love. Everything? Always? Who can live up to such a demand?

Most likely easy to understand is the fact that many people use anger and guilt to manipulate their spouses into feeling the pain that they are feeling. If you have been guilty of acting in unloving ways towards your mate, repent and ask God to give you a heart that can love even when it hurts. Your role as wife/husband has not changed just because of the outward circumstances. You are called to love/respect your spouse regardless of what is happening around you. Your calling is still your calling until death, remember? (and, no, you aren't allowed to kill them to speed that up)

Christ is our model of perfect love. Can you love your spouse with the love of Christ? Are you willing to die for them? You can love your spouse in this way because Christ first loved you. Oh, you might have to remind yourself a time or two or three or four or okay, a hundred...but it CAN be done. 

"All this is for your benefit, so that the grace that is reaching more and more people may cause thanksgiving to overflow to the glory of God. Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all." 2 Corinthians 4:15-17

We have to learn to love without counting the cost. God will bless you.

"Know therefore that the LORD your God is God; he is the faithful God, keeping his covenant of love to a thousand generations of those who love him and keep his commandments." Deuteronomy 7:9

When you have an exhausting day think of the generations that will be affected.....the reward is so much greater than the trial you are enduring.