Men's Advance Weekend

Josh is getting ready to leave for REZ Men's Advance 2011.  Many people do not realize that THIS was a pivotal moment in time for Josh's recovery process--for our healing.  God did it, but I, without a doubt, believe that this was a GOD thing.  Josh and I had just moved to Colorado, and we moved with him having NO job.  It seemed crazy, but we really felt that it was to save our marriage....which was worth that risk.  The only thing I regret is the people who were affected and are still affected by the time, money, and overall expense of our move/moves. Family is awesome to help out, but I wish it only affected us.  (okay, yes, a rabbit trail...but I wanted to say THANK YOU to those people...you know who you are.) 

Rez Men's Advance was quickly approaching, and we had just arrived. We had no idea what it was about, but we had purposed that although REZ was a large church.....we were going to get plugged-in.  With absolutely NO income we had no way of financially affording a trip to the mountains.  Men's 6:33 (the men's group) offered a scholarship to pay for Josh's FULL registration.  It was an investment we will NEVER forget. 

Josh can probably share more from his perspective, but you see, I had been praying for Josh to be surrounded by men that would encourage him, befriend him, and embrace him.  To walk back home is never easy, but to STAY home and face the consequences...THAT takes a STRONG man.  Things are not easy when you walk into that kind of brokenness. Seeing your children weep when you leave for work, asking if you are returning at the end of the day....those can NOT be easy questions/scenarios to encounter.  He needed MEN--HONEST, HUMBLE MEN. 

My prayer wasn't so much for an accountability partner--but for fellow strugglers, not moral giants. They need to be able to sympathize with the struggle, either because they have struggled through it themselves or because they have successfully counseled those who have. Good friends see that we can all have weaknesses and they do not see themselves as above the problem. Josh needed men that were able to embrace him and yet be BOLD and HONEST.  AND not let him hide...DRAWING truth out of him. In my heart, I knew he was ready to tell the truth, but he needed men who could handle it, too! We had already lost people along the way.  He needed friends, fellow travelers, not cops. A cop is someone who is just looking over your shoulder for you to mess up. You only interact with a cop when he catches you breaking the law.  A real friend is someone who is willing to get in the vehicle with you, helps you drive in the lines, travels with you in life, in good times and bad, helps you look out for the potholes, helps you read the road signs, helps you get to where you are going. No doubt we may need those "cops" in our life, but this was NOT what I was praying for.  The Christian community has LOTS of cops.

Josh needed fellow soldiers, not wimps. As the ancient proverb goes, “Wounds from a sincere friend are better than many kisses from an enemy.” Real friends are willing to call us out when we’ve given up on our commitments, willing to confront us without condemning us. They don’t shy away from the hard stuff or become wimps in the face of our faults. They help us fight.

The night of the first meeting the men were all gathered together after the meeting; I can really only picture it from a girl's perspective........I do hope he shares. (hint, hint)   I can imagine the meeting was good, but there must have been SOMETHING different about this night.  Something was brewing in the HEAVENS--prayers are POWERFUL things, Friends!!!  The men started to open up, and Josh decided instead of hiding and giving a typical "I'm fine, let's move on to someone else's life" after being asked a question---the dam broke.  TO HEAR ONE MAN willing to share his story...willing to tell some details about his messed up life, willing to look ugly and sinful....he gained friends that will NEVER leave him. From my recollection they stayed up REALLY late.  Through the things that happened that night, Josh has some men in his life that have learned what REAL fighting looks like.  We are all stronger for the relationships and things that happened that night--3 years ago.  Honest, it seems like MORE years than that!!! 

My words of gratitude seem inadequate compared to what I gained....a humble, broken, repentant man...with friends that accepted him with all of his faults, and yet helped walk him through those UGLY details of being a prodigal son, yet returned and redeemed.  Friends willing to say, "Do NOT lie to me and tell me you are fine, because I can SEE that you are NOT fine.  I can tell in your voice that you are NOT doing okay!!"  Those kind are priceless.

Pray those people into your spouse's life!! I did, and I definitely have a better marriage for it.  Some of these men still meet together every other week, just to check up on each other. It's growing, as the need is not a one time thing.  Yes, they laugh and joke and eat...they are still REAL.  BUT they have found a way to also BRING down heaven through their prayers, and they have become better men and husbands for it. 

My prayers are for this weekend to be a GOD encounter for some more men; it was for mine....Josh is in a different place. He is not a broken-down soldier in need of food and water....he has plenty to teach now.  He happens to be one that survived that battle that so many men aren't even willing enough to admit they are in, until it is TOO late.  Praying that some divine appointments are made. While the men draw close to God may He reveal to them the broken and hurting; may the Words of God and His wisdom flow freely. 

It's gonna be a good one..........in Jesus' Mighty Name!