He Only Cares About You!

When you read my posts you have to understand that I don't really have a desire to share the brutally honest truth of the matter. It's not because I don't want to help where I can; I do want to help you. I don't want to share because it makes me do a whole lot of introspection and looking back to a dark time in my life. I hate looking back to that time!! But, by me looking back and then sharing my testimony, I strip the enemy of any ammunition (guilt, condemnation, depression, and regret) that he would seek to arm himself with against me and my family. So, I share this for selfish reasons; I want to continue to walk in the victory that my Jesus has bestowed upon me. The blood of the Lamb and my testimony make for a deadly combination to the enemy! (Rev. 12:11)

When I came home, I knew there was a lot of work that needed to be done. I did not know if I was up for it. I knew going back home was going to be a tearful, gut-wrenching, grit-your-teeth-to-make-it-through type of journey. To be perfectly honest, I was not home because I wanted to be. I came home because I didn't know what else to do.

I came home because I couldn't do this to my wife and kids anymore. The hurt that I inflicted everyday by my being gone was not fair. In my mind, I reasoned that I would give it another try...even if it meant that I was unhappy in doing it. I figured that I was man enough to deal with some unhappiness if it meant my family would be in a better place.

(This, by the way, is a flawed sense of morals, priorities, and responsibilities. I will address this in a minute.)

It's interesting though that, for immature and weak people, God does not care your reasons for why we do something, He only cares about who we are. He does not care if it is because out of simple but defiant obedience or because of our love for Him. He does not care if we accept His Son to escape hell fire or because we desperately want to serve Him. For those of us that are weak, He does not care; He can address the reasons for 'why' at a later date. And He did for me!

In the Scripture, we find Jesus calling to Himself a fisherman named Peter. Peter was an odd bird to put it mildly. One minute he is professing his undying devotion to Jesus, the next he is busy denying Him. Although having walked with Jesus for 3 years, he still pulls his sword in defense of the Messiah. When Jesus speaks of His eventual betrayal and death, Peter rebukes Jesus. And yet this same Peter is the one that preaches the first sermon after the Holy Spirit came into the upper room. This Peter was the same one that when he found himself sentenced to crucifixion at the end of his life asks to be crucified upside-down rather than dishonor the way in which His Master died. This Peter was a key leader in the establishment of the early church. God does not care about the 'why'; He cares about the 'who'.

Hey, Stander....He doesn't care about why you are standing. He doesn't care if you hate the idea of it but do it anyway. His only care is about you. You are the 'who' He cares about. You are the reason why!

Hey, Prodigal....He doesn't care about why you left. He doesn't care about why you are coming home. He doesn't care about the condition in which you return. His only care is for you. He only cares about you. He can deal with the junk you carry later. Right now, He wants to put a new robe on your back, a new ring on your finger, and new sandals on your feet. He wants to kill the fatted calf at your return. And, right now...at this very moment, He is running to embrace you! He only cares about you!

As I said earlier, when I came home I didn't want to be there. But God, in His infinite supply of love and grace, began to gently and firmly change my heart. It took some time but I eventually wanted to be there with my wife. I wanted my marriage to work. I was ready for the pain that I had to face in order to facilitate healing. I was ready to work and to fight. My 'why' had changed.

I had thought that I was man enough to do it on my own. Like I said...that is flawed reasoning. I would be able to make my stand for a time but I could only do so much in my own strength. As long as I was the 'why' I would fall again. I would be able to do everything in the physical. But, in case you are just learning this....standing for your marriage is not a physical fight. It is a fight that you cannot see with your natural eyes.

My 'why' became Jesus! Jesus became more than just the motivating factor for lasting change; He must become the foundation! He is the only One that can do it. If you are the only reason who you are, you will only be able to maintain for so long. But if Jesus becomes your foundation for who you are, you can do more than what you are capable of.

Jesus carried the weight of sin and endured the punishment for sin for all of humanity. Over and over He was whipped and beaten for me and you. And as they were nailing Him to the cross, He cries out, "Father, forgive them! They don't know what they are doing!" That kind of power...that kind of forgiveness...that kind of love now lives inside of you.

With that power, forgiveness, and love inside of you, you will be able to endure the pain of an unfaithful spouse over and over again. You will be able to forgive in the face of hatred. You will be able to walk that road back to home and face down whatever drove you away. You will the worth in fighting for what others may say is dead and hopeless.

When Jesus is for you it does not matter the odds against you!

He only cares about you!

Josh