A common complaint coming from the camp of men is that they don't get enough sex. Even if they are getting it 3+ days a week...it's not enough. Is it ever? (HAHAHAHA)
The point is not about women not having enough conversation or men not getting enough sex. The point is that all of us have needs that sometime, or maybe all too often, go unmet. For us to make this grounds for divorce or separation is ludicrous! If we believe that another imperfect human being can somehow fulfill all of our needs, we are believing a lie.
You are imperfect; your spouse is imperfect. We get mad and irritated when that other imperfect person in our life does not meet all of our own imperfect needs. If you, as the more sexually-charged member of your marriage, become mad that you are not getting enough sex maybe you should ask if you are giving the other what they are needing. Or if you are mad because they want more frisky behavior and all you want is some more adult conversation, ask yourself are you giving it up first? Sounds a bit hypocritical, huh?
If we are honest with ourselves we will have to admit that we have dismissed our spouses needs only to push for the fulfillment of our own. Not only hypocritical....how selfish of us! And we (Josh and Serena) are no exceptions. We have done this over and over again. Not as often but still it can be an issue.
However, life is all about cycles. Cycles of sin, of depression, of success, of increase...cycles are present all around us. Women have a monthly cycle that men learn early on to give a wide berth to. Men have them too! It sometimes takes women...and men...to learn the guy's cycle. But, I digress...
Cycles...we all have them. If you can honestly look at your life and the cycle of your marriage, you will see that their are times when you get all the sex you can handle, men, and you get all the conversation you bring forth, women. It's not about actually having a need that is unmet. It's about not having the need met when you demand it. That is what makes us most angry.
But, all of this is beside the point. Here is what the Word of God says about it...
Philippians 4:19
And my God will meet all your needs
according to the riches of his glory in Christ Jesus.
Often we hear this preached and taught that this is in reference to the material, financial, and tangible needs that we have. Why do we limit the ability and resources of God? If His Word says that He will meet ALL of our needs, doesn't He mean ALL of our needs? Not only the monetary and material but also the emotional, spiritual, and....yes, sexual needs. It may seem weird to think about God being able to meet our sexual needs but the Creator made our bodies; I think He has knowledge sufficient to know how to satisfy or suppress those needs.
If your need is for more in depth, heart-felt communication and you are unable at this time to get it from your spouse, talk to God. He is a great listener but He also has more than enough to say that it will far exceed the fulfillment of your need. If you need more of the physical type of love (sex), look to God. He will be able to quench that longing in your physical body by giving you more to deal with in the spiritual realm that you will forget about that minor need.
Whatever you need, God's got it. He's ready to give it to you...just ask.
Josh and Serena
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