When I began my departure from my family, I started practicing what it would be like to be a divorced dad. I did all the "fun" things. I took them all out to dinner once a week...to wherever they wanted to go. I was going to be the fun dad. I thought that was "being there" for them. However, there is more to being there than dinners once a week or going out for ice cream.
This is not meant to bring blame or condemnation if you find yourself in this situation because of your spouse's choices. Being a divorced spouse is not something that is to be taken lightly. The movies and TV make it look like it is no big deal. Our culture makes it easier and easier to be a divorced parent. But, it is not meant to be this way.
If you, as a parent, desire to be there for your kids means that you have to be there...physically, emotionally, and spiritually. It means that you are there for the good times (going out to eat, ice cream, winning the soccer game, birthdays) and the bad times (skinned knees, dashed hopes, bad dreams, and thunderstorms). You don't get to pick which days you want to be a great parent. Great parents aren't made by the good days; they are made by the bad days that you have but have to pull it together for your children.
Wives pray your husbands home, for the sake of your children. Don't allow Satan to win this battle. It doesn't just end with dashed childhood hopes and dreams; this carries into adulthood. Think about the long term effects and how their life will turn out. Teach your children that God makes the impossible possible. Keep standing for the return of your children's father.
Fathers, GO HOME, if you are not where you should be. Your daughters need you to affirm them and show them what to look for in a future spouse. They need their dad to be there to protect them from the hormones of young men. Your sons need their father to teach them how to be a real man. How to change a flat tire and how to stand courageous in the face of danger and adversity. In years to come, don't leave them standing in the card section at Walmart wondering what kind of card to give you on a day which honors your role as their father...wishing it wasn't so hard to pick the "right" card. Be there for them and being there for them is where GOD wants you.
Happy Father's Day!!
Josh and Serena
4 comments:
Josh, your family is blessed to have you. Happy Father's Day to a man who has made the right choices♥
Happy Father's Day Josh. May God continue to Bless & Prosper you. Serena & your children are very lucky to have an awesome & godly husband & father... Because you chose to follow and obey our Heavenly Father...
Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it. Proverbs 22:6
Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word. Ephesians 5:25-26
Thank you for the wonderful post and Happy Fathers day. Thank you for standing,encouraging and supporting others who are doing the same.
I heard Presiden Obama on the radio giving a Father's Day address. He said the trite little saying that I'm so tired of: It's not about the quantity of time you spend with your kids. It's about the quality.
I've got nothing against quality time and those special trips to the zoo or out for ice cream. But, seriously, you are so right. That is not what makes a good father. Was it Dobson or Rainey who is famous for saying, "Children spell love, T.I.M.E." It's so true. A few qualities moments will not make up for being there every evening for supper and them seeing you mowing the grass on Saturdays, paying bills at your desk, tying their shoes, being there to see them when they come in from a party, etc. Just being THERE is so important!
Good post, Joshie.
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