Paul is indicating an active, vigorous endurance, not a passive, resigned acceptance of all that happens. We often talk about the "fight" for our marriage. When we use these terms we are envisioning the soldier who battles on no matter the opposition or the outcome. Josh's favorite movies are always when the solider fights to the end. He endures a lot, but he fights with purpose. He has passion. He does not allow the difficulties of the moment to rob him of strength and purpose; he fights on unflinchingly.
So it is with love. Love's endurance is a positive and proactive acceptance of life with all its difficulties, not a passive attitude. It doesn't have to mean you sit around hoping things will change and doing nothing. Many of you have read the story of the FIGHT for Josh. I didn't sit quietly hoping things would be different. Love does more than put up with life's hardship; it grows and develops as it struggles against them. Love sees problems positively, everything can be a teaching moment. When Josh was gone I knew that it was better that we faced this mess NOW, then have to face it in 10 more years!!! Life has problems; love determines how we are going to endure.
Love is not putting up with a difficult relationship or situation, enduring it, persevering with it because you "think" it is the right thing to do. Love is not something that you can think about or reason out the "right" answer. You have to ask yourself and know for yourself...is it the right thing? Have you asked God; what did He say about it? Have you looked the Scripture on what God is telling you?
Persevering and enduring love has the backbone of courage. That kind of love enables us to have the courage to endure and succeed in the face of all that is painful. We don't pretend that what you may be experiencing is not painful. To have your "one flesh" trying to rip you apart....Ouch! Courage is the inner power to resist the painful experiences of life by facing up to the evil that attacks us and not surrendering. NO SURRENDER! . "Be strong and courageous" is the exhortation of Moses to Joshua, accompanied by the promise, "the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you or forsake you." (Deuteronomy 31:6-8) Love is strong and courageous because God goes with us and will never forsake us. We are not alone. God the Omnipotent, the Almighty, is with us. That has to be encouraging!!
Over the last couple of weeks we have looked at Jesus, the perfect picture of love--the perfect example. Jesus endured to the end. His courage during torture, agony, betrayal, rejection and eventually His death. Did He ever wish that He didn't have to endure it...of course! BUT, He knew His Father's will--in His pain he never tried to escape or find a "loophole." He told His disciples what to expect; He knew what He would face. He was doing the Father's Will--no matter the persecution or injustice.
We are called to face our difficulties in the same manner. When we seek to follow Him, we gain His courageous love. We know many people that say, "But I don't think I could do that; I don't think I can continue enduring the pain and suffering." We understand; we get it. But, learn to draw on Jesus's courageous love to persevere in the face of suffering. See beyond the trials to the victory. You must get yourself to the place where you focus on the goal. Face your trials from a place of victory, not defeat.
"Be on your guard; stand firm in the faith; be men of courage, be strong. Do everything in love." (1 Corinthians 16:13,14)
Love without strength is worthless; strength without love is only aggressive. The combination of the two is a twofold cord which cannot be broken. If I had fed Josh milk and pancakes with only a strength and stubborness to do what was I thought was right, I believe he would have seen right through it. To endure trials you must have strength, but to have strength with no love....it's useless. We are called to be men and women of courage, to be strong, to do everything in love. What a high calling this is.
To be a Christian in these terms is to be someone of consequence, someone who will accomplish something important. It is a noble calling of heroic dimensions. There is nothing wimpy about it. Love that always perseveres resonates with strength. When people see you loving in this manner they will say, "Wow, you are really strong!" but in reality you would like to cry out, "Okay, but I don't WANT to be strong." Persevering love HAS to be strong; there is no other way to endure. We make excuses for ourselves so that we can under-perform in the battles of life. We are capable of more than we know when we are put to the test. All too often the battles are lost because we give up loving too soon. Picture the cross...Christ NEVER gave up. His eye was on the goal...our salvation!
Love always perseveres in order to avoid the dishonor of letting someone else down who is depending on us, who believes in us, for whom we are the hands and heart of Christ. During the few moments during Josh's absence that I would see a glimmer of hope I knew I was seeing that Christ's love WAS working. Our children were also learning valuable lessons. I loved from a place of victory. Love does not walk away from commitments when it would be easy, reasonable, and even justified to do so. Love endures to the end. The world has a lot of starters but very few finishers. Love finishes the race. Love does not give up. Love does not quit. Love perseveres in the battle against evil because it wants to win the victory.
"He who stands firm to the end WILL be saved." (Matthew 10:22;24:13)
Josh and Serena
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