Biggest Fan

Who is your spouse's biggest fan?  Your answer may appear to be obvious but you might want to take a serious look at your life.  You might just find out that it is not you that is their biggest fan.  It might be their coworker or best friend.  It might be their boss that roots for them the most because they always come through.  Or it might be your wife's girlfriend that is always encouraging her in what she is doing.  If it is not you, you are endeavoring to walk a very dangerous road where your spouse does not need your affirmation but someone else's.

When someone else has the power to motivate YOUR spouse to action...when someone else has the power to cheer up YOUR spouse, you are creating a potential firestorm.  When they have a bad day who will they look to?  They will keep their emotions bottled up from you and share them with the one that they know will be there for them and help them break out of the funk.  That SOMEONE should be YOU!!

Honestly, what do you do that would indicate that you are their biggest fan?   Do you tell them?  Are you excited to hear what they have to say, even if it insignificant and boring?  Do you talk about them (in a positive way, of course)?  Does your spouse KNOW that you admire them?  You should be working towards this goal!!!

You might be saying, "But, I'm not their biggest fan.  I'm not even sure if I am a member of the fan club!"  We are not suggesting you lie. If you are not their biggest fan, you should be! This might be hard for you but it is ABSOLUTELY necessary.  You have got to let them know you are their biggest fan. There should be no question in their mind who's side you are on.  If your spouse enjoys playing music do you admire their skill or do you compare them to someone else who is better?  Be critical with yourself and see if you REALLY do cheer them on in life.

Becoming your spouse's biggest fan is not a fad or something cool to do for a short period.  It should be your life.  A part of who you are (or need to become) is the person that when they wake up they immediately begin to think about how they can make their spouse's day better.

Some practical steps...tell them how great they are.  Tell them how much you appreciate the little things they do to help you (no matter how small or unwarranted or even inconvenient they may be....after all, their heart is in the right place) and how much they are loved.  When they come in through the door greet them with a smile and a kiss.  Instead of choosing a movie that you want to watch, let them pick.  Make his lunch.  Men, try not to make such a huge mess wherever you go (I know...we are REALLY pushing on this one!!).  This one always makes me (Josh) feel AMAZING...talk about them, especially when they think that you don't know that they are close enough to hear.  Brag about them to your friends.  Become like grade-school boys and tease them.  Be a flirty high school girl that practically swoons when her jock boyfriend walks into the room.  It might seem silly but when did we become so mature that we can't have fun?  I heard a guy from our church say this about his wife...I'm crushin' on her.  If you don't already, get a crush on your spouse....and then act on it!

Josh and Serena